I’m a 25 year old woman, who still lives with her parents, but is working hard to get out and own my own. I’ve always been a great student and respectful “law abiding” daughter. But I also lost someone I loved last year, not a parent, but someone that I considered a huge part of me — my grandma. She passed within a week and me and my family had to watch. It was the most painful experience of my life. But if it taught me one thing, it’s that life is so very short.

This weekend I traveled to a neighboring city in my state to explore it to see if it’s possibly a place I’d want to live. It’s about 4 hours away from my parents so of course they aren’t ecstatic about it. When I call to tell them how beautiful I think it is, all I get is reasons why THEY don’t like it and why they’d never be there. I’d say a couple years ago I’d cross this place off as place I’d want to eventually call home BECAUSE of their opinion. But now, at 25 I’ve realized just how crippling (and toxic) parents can be. Now, while I know my parents mean well and really do love me and want the best for me, I can see that they’ve been sort of selfish and it has stunted my growth (I have incredibly unhealthy social anxiety). But I’m here, in this new city and I love it and I’m here because I want to be and I know that if they love me, they’ll support me and just want me to be happy and trust that they’ve raised a smart girl, who knows what she wants.